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Should I agree to counseling with my bf to see if it can be worked out?
I left my house and asked my bf to move out 4 weeks ago. Reason I did this was because in my opinion he was very jealous/controlling. He would say I don’t like that shirt too low cut, don’t wear that. No tank tops under your scrubs at work, your looking for attention and it is not right. Couldn’t make hair puffy as again same reason, I was drawing attention to myself when I was there to work. I don’t dress slutty at all and I was told I was looking at men I wasn’t or doing things I wasn’t. He would get really angry and call me a ***** or whore and yell right in my face. When I would come back at him, he would say I was talking too loud and the kids would hear me and come to me and I tried to fight him from doing it but he would push my hands and arms out of the way to cover my mouth to shut me up. He had to have my passwords to both my email and my cell phone because he always felt I was hiding something..
He says he is sorry, that he didn’t realize what he was doing and how upset I was, if he would have known he would have stopped. He said that by me leaving was a big wake up call and that he would go to counseling. I told him I needed to be alone and sort my thoughts. Told him my counselor told me to have him enter therapy and get in a mens group and after 4 to 6 months of hard work by him and me seeing he was serious about getting better, then we might be able to take steps if I want to at that point into a relationship/counseling together.
He says we need to be in counseling now, that our love won’t survive another 4 to 5 months and he has went to 3 sessions of therapy and we need to go together and start slowly to get back together so I can see how much he has changed. I only will text him and won’t accept calls or call him or see him because he is very forceful with his opinons on what we should do and how we should handle things and my line of thinking is just wrong and it is because I am listening to too many people.
Do you think I should do as he asks and go to counseling with him and start meeting him for coffee? Do you think he really can change from what I experienced day after day of jealousy and control and anger???
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